Sometimes I wonder if you can really be set on a predetermined unfortunate course for the day. Is there anything you can do about it? Can you think your way out of it? Should you just have stayed in bed? Will it be like a Japanese drinking party, and the next day it will be as if the principal never got a lap dance from the PE teacher?
I brought two pairs of work pants to Japan.
This morning I woke up with a slug problem in my bathroom.
Normally these two happenstances would never cross paths, but if you wake up on the wrong side of the bed, they inevitably will. For example, if you are double jointed and also still secretly like the boy band Hanson, those two aspects of life will definitely cross each other in some unfortunate way, just because that is where life is headed on a bad day.
What I am trying to say is, I now only have one pair of pants to wear to work. My god, I have become Mr. Gibbons, my high school physics teacher that wore the same thing everyday. I still have slugs appearing on my walls, but yet my house smells like bleach and it makes my nose sting. I managed to (politely of course) get kicked out of class. I sprayed the school secretary with bathroom water. I am trying to think of what could happen next so I can change course. If I don’t move from my desk for the rest of the day that would probably divert most inopportune moments. This means I probably shouldn’t say anything to anyone either. Or make eye contact. Closing my computer would be a good idea just in case I fall asleep and there is a malfunction and my nude pictures show up as the screen saver.
Of course there are some major, major F ups than can and legitimately do ruin a day. I am merely questioning the small, unnecessary, and often serial ones that just don’t give you a break. Who is to blame: myself, the zodiac, Japan?
(Mom I do not have nude pictures)
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